Sneaky Ways Anxiety Tricks Us Into Feeling Safe

Over-Preparing for Everything

We’ve all been there—overthinking, double-checking, triple-checking. Whether it’s obsessively reviewing your work schedule, researching every detail about an event, or rewriting a message just to get it right, over-preparing is a common way we try to control anxiety. But it doesn’t make the anxiety go away. Instead, it ramps it up. The truth is, life is unpredictable, and you can’t control every moment. No amount of preparation can prevent life from throwing curveballs.

Carrying “Just in Case” Stuff

Do you pack extra chargers, snacks, pain relievers, or backup outfits? While it’s wise to be prepared, if you feel like you can’t leave the house without your “safety stash,” it’s a sign that anxiety might be in control. You’re not preparing for things that are likely to happen, but for imagined worst-case scenarios—like running out of phone battery or needing something you won’t use.

Hiding Behind Your Phone

Grabbing your phone when anxiety strikes might feel like an instant fix. Scrolling through social media, checking messages, or diving into TikTok can distract you from the moment. But this coping strategy keeps you from engaging with the uncomfortable feelings you’re trying to avoid. While it might give you short-term relief, it won’t help you build confidence in handling social situations or anxiety-provoking moments.

Relying on “Safe” People

As we get older, social dynamics change. Maybe you continually reach out to the same friend for plans because you know they’ll say yes, or you avoid talking to someone new because it feels easier to stick with the people you know. Having a support system is excellent, but leaning too much on the same people can stop you from building your confidence in new social situations. It’s important to push yourself to engage with others outside your usual circle, even if it initially feels uncomfortable.

Overthinking Conversations

We’ve all replayed a conversation, wondering if we said the wrong thing or appeared weird. Overthinking is like a loop that keeps anxiety alive. It makes you obsess over things you can’t change. In the end, overthinking just builds more stress without offering any real solutions.

Procrastination (Avoiding Tasks)

Procrastination isn’t just about laziness—it’s often a way to avoid the anxiety of starting a task. Whether it’s putting off a work project, avoiding an important phone call, or delaying a conversation, procrastination provides short-term relief but piles on stress later. The longer you delay, the more anxious you’ll feel when the deadline or task finally arrives.

Sticking to Routines to Avoid the Unknown

Routines bring comfort because they’re predictable. You know what to expect, and there’s no room for surprises. But when you stick to the same routine all the time, you’re avoiding the uncertainty that can lead to growth. Life is unpredictable, and the more you resist change, the harder it becomes to cope with the unexpected.